NO I'm not going to FRB's show tonight! Sheesh.
I am actually Single Parenting tonight. The kids are in the bathtub and I am perched on the toilet seat, shielding the laptop from errant splashes. There is no situation like Bath Time to show me that I am the laziest mother on earth, you guys. Basically I do not care what they do in the bath tub as long as they are 1) not fighting and 2) not drowning. Like, I have told them about forty-seven times not to drink the bath water, not to slurp the bath water, not to put their MOUTHS in the stupid WATER. But they keep doing it and I think to myself, "At least they are not 1) fighting or 2) drowning." And I go on with my typing.
For those of you aghast that I am Blogging Whilst Bathing, I have my feet kicked up on the tub. I have negative twelve feet to cross to whisk anyone out of any precarious position. I'm pretty sure I would even throw the beloved laptop aside if action were required.
I don't see how I can feel like it's been a long week when we were on VACATION on Monday and it's also not even Friday. That's three whole days of parenting for me, and two of those days contained large amounts of Other People Entertaining My Kids. The Bride was up here this week with her new husband and if I hadn't had such a great time I'd be embarrassed of how much we ditched the kids with New Husband so we could talk. So we're sitting in a park and snacking on Rainier cherries while New Husband kicks a ball around or takes them to throw rocks in the lake. Or we're hanging out at the table finishing giant slices of chocolate cake while New Husband plays hide and seek in the backyard. "But he LOVES kids!" she kept saying. Worked for me!
Maybe it was just today that felt long. We had no plans, no one to see, no errands to run. We went for a long walk in the morning, but Jack ruined it by acting out in the grocery store where we stopped to buy fancy overnight pull ups. (PSA: do not use swim diapers in place of pull ups. Just go to the store and buy some more. Unless you like laundry, that is. I hate laundry.) So he was a brat and I used my Mean Mommy voice and then he started to howl, in public, and I managed not to die until we were safely back on the trail, away from People Whose Children Always Behave.
But the repercussions meant Jack was remorseful enough to behave through "quiet time" and the rest of the afternoon. There were sprinklers and peaches and running around in underpants. It's not supposed to stay this warm, so we tried to take advantage. Even if "advantage" sometimes means watching back to back episodes of Sesame Street in the basement where things are twenty degrees cooler.
It's days like these, even with the Mortifying Grocery Store Episode, that make me think I couldn't possibly be doing anything else.
While the kids ate dinner with Elmo, I trolled Redfin for an in-advisably long time. The prices are dropping, making me in-advisably optimistic. We're not planning to buy any time soon, and we intend to be exceedingly picky when we do, but it doesn't hurt to look, right? Quite a few oldish-but-updated houses popped up - the kind I like, in neighborhoods I love. Of course it'd be a major stretch to afford those, but I looked at them anyway, favorited them anyway.
I hate the kitchen floor in this house. I loathe it. Every time I sweep it I think: if this were MY house this stuff would be ripped up in a FLASH. But then I remind myself that it's not my house and, therefore, not my problem. And something about that makes the permanent dirtiness more manageable. Same with the lack of dining room, the ugly carpet, the awful front door, the laundry room, the claustrophobic shower and the losing battle I am fighting with the weeds in the backyard. The fact that these are not my problems to own makes them infinitely more bearable. It also makes hunting around on Redfin a frequent event. What WOULD the house-that-is-all-mine look like?
I can wait, though. I don't need to be responsible for discolored marked up kitchen floors any time soon.
And oh look, SOMEONE is trying to drink the water AGAIN.