Responds well to regimentation

I don't know if there's anything more fun than planning a vacation. Very few things, I'm sure. I don't even know if the actual VACATION is as fun as planning. I realize that's a bit of a bummer statement for most people, but I am not most people. I am The Planniest Planner I know.

(Here my Sacramento ladies show you their email inboxes, sigh great big what-can-we-do sighs and pour themselves another glass of wine.)

I've thrown myself into planning our road trip (I think I'm going to save the WHY of Disneyland for Parenting) and I am, as they say, In My Element. I have a guide book (that I didn't buy until I'd read almost half of it, and almost half of every other comparable book), a Plot To Cut My Hotel Reservations By 40%, a spreadsheet and a running list of necessary packing items. Every time I think about our trip I get that happy anticipation buzz and I routinely scout the Disneyland discount websites to make sure I'm not missing out on anything.

[Oh wait. Now that I'm giving this a bit more thought I realize I am NOT the planniest planner I know. That title goes to my sister-in-law who will spend about an hour online before we go out to dinner, reading restaurant reviews, making sure an establishment can meet all our expectations, printing exact directions and deciding what she will order for her kids. Some people can't appreciate this kind of talent, but I think it's why we get along so well. It's also why I have lifted absolutely no fingers planning for, and therefore haven't written about, our Las Vegas trip in August. SIL has taken care of the entire thing and I must say to all you fellow Oldest Children- find a way to marry The Youngest, because you'll finally get to experience the No One Expects You To Know Or Do Anything kind of life your siblings have always enjoyed and IT IS FABULOUS.]

[Except the Las Vegas In August part. That is just BAD PLANNING. I am going to be DEEP FRIED when I return to my pale and pallid Pacific Northwesterners.]

So anyway. Planny plan plan.

Yesterday, though, I was kind of a wreck. It was like I'd taken my entire summer and tried to cram it into an hour: this trip, that trip, family visiting, someone's birthday, MY birthday, a retreat weekend, childcare, coordinating my trips with other people's trips and maybe I was getting a little jittery.

Then maybe I was looking around my disaster of a house and feeling defeated before I'd even begun.

Possibly I was looking out my window at the tomato plant I moved three feet to the right to make room for the zucchini I planted too close together - a now very dead-looking tomato plant - and feeling frustrated with myself for not knowing how to 1) plant a vegetable garden and 2) transplant a tomato plant and 3) keep it alive.

And maybe I'd just gotten off the phone with my brother who was very floaty free with his summer plans and couldn't really tell me when he'd be in town, he might know in another few weeks, and it wasn't his lack of planny that bugged me so much as the fact that I was BUGGED. What is wrong with me? Why can't I be floaty free too?

Which all funnelled back into my spreadsheets and reservations, my inability to pull several things off at once, not always getting it right the first time, having to wait for information, feeling like I'm forcing other people to finalize THEIR plans, am I really THIS BAD about PLANNING?

I felt very much out of control. I know there are worse feelings, but a control freak can't be sure of what those things are.

Molly was doing her one hour in the crib / another hour in the living room pack 'n play nap routine, so I had to give up fixing the downstairs and hide out in my bedroom till naptime was over. I took my Disneyland guide with me (wanting to think about happier things!) One well-loved (or despised, depending on the kind of person you are) feature of these books are the Touring Plans. Step by step instructions for how to ride as many rides as possible in one day, with the least amount of waiting in line. People after my efficiency-loving heart! The book painstakingly describes the research and work that went into devising these touring plans - they even use the word ALGORITHM - and while I have absolutely no intention of dragging my family through the Dumbo Or Die Plan (ACTUAL NAME) - my Disney expectations begin and end with the hotel pool - you BET I'd be using those plans if I were on my own.

And then I read this on page 79:

We have discovered you can't implant a touring plan in certain personalities without rapid and often vehement rejection. Some folks just do not respond well to the regimentation. If you bump into this problem with someone in your party, it's best to roll with the punches...

Here I was feeling out of control. Like the Least Fun Person Ever. Embarrassed to be the person who is so nervous about the details that she insists on contacting all the people who AREN'T nervous just to MAKE them nervous. Nobody likes that person. But apparently there are enough of us to compel a guide book into reassuring our neurotic little hearts and that, in and of itself, made me feel so much better.

Comments

[Manda]

Once I was a planny-planner. And then I married the biggest "let's fly by the seat of our pants" boy EVER. So I had to let go of my desire to planny-plan EVERYTHING or risk institutionalization as all my plans went BYE BYE.
Luckily his sister is even MORE planny and she is the BOSS. She planned my entire wedding and I got everything my way because NO ONE messes with the Queen of Planny in our family! I just told her what I wanted and she made it happened. Sigh. I wish SHE could plan my vacations (and all my major life decisions and moves etc)!!

[Manda]

And yes I just said "made it happened." I really need to start eating real food again.

[Lisa]

My husband is a whiz at getting the cheapest hotel prices and staying at the best hotels. Four stars, $48/night. Three stars, river view, $28/night. Priceline and Hotwire. He knows how to work them!

Also, I heard there's this feature at Disney now where you can swipe your card and get a "call back" time for your rides instead of standing in line. Something to make the day a little smoother with kids.

I desperately want to come to Sacramento, but I just can't make it work. Please say you will do this again someday. Please?

[Jess]

You and I are so similar. I am already planning our fall stress-busting trip, even though we don't know for sure that we'll even be able to go.

Does your road trip include Denver? DOES IT?

[Tracy]

I don't know Disneyland, but I've been to Disney World a few times now.

And the number one advice I have is this: Don't try to do everything. Pick what is most important to each person going, make sure those things do happen, and then have fun with the rest. And build in downtime. It's too much otherwise, and if you do too much, you guarantee whiny children and whiny self.

When I allowed myself to not do everything, I had a great time. Even the time that we took the 3 month old, for 3 days, to WDW.

I admit I'm curious about the why you're going, since you mentioned saving it, but I'll just end my unsolicited advice here :-).

[Lindsay]

I love vacays, but I am like that person who doesn't know what airline or time the flight leaves until the day of...my husband can't stand it and I just LAUGH when I see him obsessing and researching and fretting...but I'm planning my own vacation for Scotland b/c he can't come and I really miss his obsessiveness. Currently I have not booked lodging in Glasgow, my passport is giant question mark, and my T.O bro told me yesterday the Hamilton airport is nowhere near T.O public transit so he'll have to rent a car to get me to the airport. Of course it'll all work out but you planny planners aren't so bad after all.

[Megan]

Oh! You should see the Summer Schedule of Fun 2009 Edition. I simply can not face three months of nothing with three boys at home. It makes me a little ill to just think of it. So the Summer Schedule is where I take the three months on one giant taped-together page and pencil in anything and everything in my area there is to do. Then, at least I have a PLAN. I will email you a picture of it if you want. People either love it (like us) or think I am insane.

[Sarah in Ottawa]

FASTPASS. LOVE it at Disneyworld, assume they have it at Disneyland. I, too, am a devotee of the book you have and LOVE the touring plans because they indicate the time of day to hit things. I don't implement them exactly, but they give me a general idea so that I can avoid my least favourite thing -- burning daylight in lines.

Also - Vegas in August isn't as awful as you imagine. You can casino hop on the Strip and effectively avoid outside, for the most part. We were there over Labour Day weekend and while it was hot, it was doable.

[Christiana]

I'm a bit of a planner - I love lists, organization, etc. Though, to be honest I tend to plan like crazy until the day before the event and then i simply roll with it... my husband says his favorite vacation ever was our honeymoon where we had almost no plans and certainly no schedule. (We had reservations at a B&B and all, but once we were there there was no structure.)

Mostly though, I'm glad you're going to be flexible w/ your expectations. So many stories about toddlers and Disney... for instance: I got there when I was 3 and was terrified of every character. Crying, cowering whenever Mickey would walk by, etc. Until I saw Pooh. Then it was like a long-lost friend had been found.

My husband and I have discovered the beauty of having a Disney property hotel - you can go back to the hotel for naps, or a rest or whatever and not have a problem going back and forth, etc. And If you want to see fireworks, may I suggest a long nap/rest time at the hotel?

[Elsha]

However planned or unplanned your day at Disneyland is, just don't be the parent who says, "You're going to have fun whether you like it or not!" A direct quote from a parent to a crying child the last time I was there. Seriously.

[Charlotte]

Sigh. Well, I happen to be similarly afflicted. Um, really similarly afflicted. Itinerary in 15 minute increments similarly afflicted.

In high school some friends and I were going to head off to the Caribbean, months and months beforehand (before we even picked an island) I called and emailed every appropriate hotel and requested mailed literature, spoken with concierges, negotiated steep discounts armed with counteroffers from other hotels and decided that I was all but obligated to execute my very own plan for world domination from my perch at The Four Seasons of my choosing.