Oh man is she blogging about blogging AGAIN?

So I am sitting down to tell you one thing I learned during Lent, which is that saving all my post-writing for after the kids go to bed is not so great for the being married thing. What's FUNNY is that it's 9pm RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND, seriously, I just watched my little laptop clock blink a new number. Also! I haven't eaten dinner. Apparently I didn't learn this thing very WELL, eh? I think I'm going to slowly back away from the computer, find something to eat and watch The Big Bang Theory with my husband. Maybe I will see you later. MAYBE NOT. This is where you are INTRIGUED.

Aaaand, now it's 10:30. I was planning to fall asleep right around now, but Phillip is up and about which means I also get to be awake. Lucky me!

Here I was thinking that I was going to "fast" from the computer during operating hours, and then do my bloggy stuff in the evenings when I wouldn't be neglecting any children. Except I was still obsessively checking my online world (I LOVE YOU TWITTER) so that's a great big Lent Fail right there. I did save writing and posting for the evening hours, though, and it quickly turned into this THING. 

I post here nearly every day during the week. I LIKE posting that often. Sometimes I think my commitment to The Blog sort of turns The Blog into A Job and I'm never sure what to think about that, but whatever, I'm having a good time. It's fun to throw stuff up here and see what sticks. It's fun to tell stories without stammering and swallowing my own tongue like I do in person. I get a huge kick out of what you guys say. Seriously, half of what Phillip is forced to listen to when he gets home from work starts with, "So this commenter said on my Blawg that BLAH BLAH BLAH." 

But when I started saving posting for the evening... well. A lot of times I did not get up from my computer chair until it was way way WAY past my bedtime and PHILLIP was going upstairs first. That NEVER happens. We'd put the kids down between seven and eight, stare blankly at the refrigerator from eight to nine and then he'd retreat to his computer and I'd retreat to mine. Sometimes we watched TV, but only if his work was finished and I already posted. Posting! It is important!

When you think about it, those are some twisted priorities. I guess I felt like it was my only chance to update, and I hate leaving the same thing up for very long. I think this is a holdover from my days as a Very Very Bored Office Worker who often wanted to email her favorite bloggers to say HEY PERHAPS YOU DON'T REALIZE THAT MY IV DRIP NEEDS NEW CONTENT.

And so that's what I did. For weeks. Until the other night when Phillip and I were suddenly all, "Um, do I know you? Do you live here? Have we met?" It was not a fun conversation.

It's not even really about the blog so much as adjusting to two kids, I think. I know, it's been over seven months, what's the deal, but life's a lot different now. I stay up so much later (SO MUCH LATER) because I cherish my no-kids time a 1000% more than before. We can't go out and do something (kids have to sleep) and we don't have friends over (they have kids) and half the time Phillip has to finish up some work or one of us has a meeting or I've got to finish some writing- I don't know if we have our down time figured out yet. I obviously shouldn't spend ALL of it on the computer. 

So yeah. Do you have YOUR downtime figured out? Do tell.

Comments

[J. Johnson]

My children are older (15 and 11), but when they said that their mom is always on the computer in a matter-of-fact way, I knew it was time to back away a bit! So now I do my blog-checking, game things in the morning before they get up (it helps being a morning person) or after they go to school (you don't have that option yet). But even if they are off doing their own thing, I am trying not to be on the computer unless it is for work (I work from home part-time) when they are in the house.

Long story short, you are doing the right thing not being on the computer when the children are up. Perhaps you could limit your blogging time to the first 1/2 hour-hour after they go to bed?

[Lindzi]

Maggie, I've been lurking around your blog for months now! I loved your posts so much, I went into the archives to get more daily chuckles. You are one talented chicky, I'll give you that. It's gotten so that the minute the boss steps out of the office, I'm hooking up my drip to your site. Must.Get.The.Fix. But even hard-core followers like me know that you have the children and the hubs and the housework and church commitments and you name it, to attend to, and I guarantee you no-one is freaking out if you skip a coupla days and take care of the important things. (slight withdrawal symptoms are manageable). I have often wondered how you manage to post almost daily - seems impossible. So take it easy!

[Lindsay]

Sorry longest comment ever, and only vaguely related to what you are talking about. AM NOT trying to say anyone has real marriage issues here. Ahem.
I don't know what the sol'n is. Ya a couple can watch tv together, but I'm not really into tv and esp not the horror that my husband watches. It doesn't seem fair that I give up the blogs at night in the name of couplehood when he doesn't have to give up anything just by default of his decompressing activity being something that two people can do together. Awareness and perspective are all I can suggest. Rules would never work at our house. Also this is sort of unrelated and not really the issue you are talking about, but I have these non religous friends who did marriage prep where the teacher(?) suggested this thing called the yes spiral and it's actually pretty neat. Whatever one spouses asks of the other you just practice saying yes to and then doing whatever it was the other spouse requested. The idea is that it becomes habit to say yes both ways, and it eliminates the five seconds of "Can I just have 5 mins for my SELF??" rage prior to snippily either denying or eye rollingly obliging the request, whether it's time, laundry help or whatever. Anyway, I sort of try to do this and I like it. As long as people aren't married to jerks, you find it's a really nice habit and you like doing things for the spouse and don't care so much that your blogs etc are totally being ignored. AND since it's a yes spiral one day you can say can I have 4 uninterupted hours with my blogs? and the other spouse might be compelled to say YES. :) So ya that's my questionable advice, focus on how focusing on him and making him happy makes you happy. And if you'll excuse me I will now retreat to the 1950's.

[Jess]

No, not really. Probably, and you'll hate me for saying this, but I think it's because we have so much of it so it isn't precious. We don't worry about it. We watch TV? Fine. We go for a hike? Also fine. You know?

[Carrie]

No, we do not have it figured out. About every 6 weeks or so, we have a discussion about not turning on the computer in the evening. That usually lasts a day. Maybe two. :)

[Jen]

We get nearly all of our downtime in bed watching TV together at night. And when we don't for some reason or another, I don't see Matt practically at all.

[Liz]

Adam and I do our separate thangs for about a week and then I'm all "I NEED TO INTERACT WITH AN ADULT ON A DAILY BASIS, AND YOU NEED TO BE IT" and have a mini freak out. Well, mostly because Adam can come home and sit and read a book until lights out. He doesn't NEED quality time like I do. I can see it being a glitch in the system for... oh... ever?

[Christiana]

I hear you. Lately, my husband has had to bring a lot of work home, so our evenings are spent watching TV in the background with each of us behind our respective laptops. It's sad.

We tend to go through phases, though - weeks at a time where we snuggle on the couch after The Fuss has gone to bed, or do work around the house (still wanting to finish our sunroom update) or compute or play video games. When something gets too much, we talk about it and switch to a new "habit".

I love that you post 5 days a week, but totally understand if you can't.

[Jessica]

I also stay up waay too late, just to enjoy the QUIET.
It seems to defeat the purpose, because shouldn't I be savoring every moment of sleep instead of playing on the internet? Yes, but I love my alone time.
So, no, I haven't gotten it all together. I am not really sure if I ever will.

[Sarah in Ottawa]

Teddy is 12 weeks old today, and though he has been a totally easy little guy thus far, I DO NOT have downtime figured out. Still working on showering regularly!

I have been consistently amazed with the frequency at which you update your blog, and the quality of said entries. Is it because you were an English major and are used to writing high volumes of content in short periods of time? I have all these amazing ideas for posts, but actually writing them is another story. I am lucky if I post an entry every 2 weeks (perhaps the Science degrees didn't train me well enough for blogging?!). So - if your blogging frequency diminishes whilst you are figuring this out, you will still be ahead of the rest of us! And your readers will be waiting with bated breath for your posts.

[Elsha]

After the baby goes to bed we typically spend our downtime on our laptops with a DVD on in the background. This works pretty well for us, probably because we spend the two hours or so before she goes to bed hanging out together with no computers or TV. We cook and eat dinner together and then usually read books to the baby before her bedtime.

[Amanda]

I'm suppose to talk to that guy I married? I KID!

We watch tv together... and I blog... or read blogs.... or change dirty diapers... The usual.

But seriously though, I think about my blog waaay too much. I leave myself little notes when I don't have time to write an actual post. When I'm having blogger's block, I panic! It's like a job sometimes... but a job that I LOVE

.... and don't get paid for....