Another seven quick takes

1. I read this article this morning and immediately went to Redfin to find us a house. I couldn't find anything in our price range. I couldn't find anything $50,000 above our price range. Decided the article was an Evil Real Estate Agent Plot, designed to 1) make me want another house (admittedly, easy to do) and 2) make me think we are Missing Out. Then I went upstairs to fold laundry and clean up the bedrooms and be content with the house I HAVE.

2. Phillip loves to snark on my love affair with the Bravo Channel, but he has no business saying anything because UFC Fight Night? What is THAT? I'll tell you what it is. It's a show with the Fear Factor guy's voice grating in the background and that, my dear Phillip, is not Shakespeare. So lay off.

3. But the Real Housewives? OMG I LOVE THEM. And I love how they're doing a New Jersey edition, like Bravo's on this mission to find all the stereotypical regional women (fake blond fake boob floozies, East Coast socialites, mob wives, and... I guess I don't know what the Atlanta 'thing' is) and create these false yet incredibly entertaining relationships. Yes, I KNOW it's total trash and I enjoy it ANYWAY. I keep wondering what The Real Housewives of Seattle would be like. Probably a bunch of ladies who live in huge sustainable compounds (lakeside, natch) with organic vegetable gardens and 3 or 4 Prii in the garage. And their arguments are about whose charity event was more green and the backstabbing is of a proper passive-aggressively polite sort.

4. I fell today. I fell while holding my baby. I've always wondered what I'd do if I fell down the stairs while holding one of my kids. Would I attempt to cushion my fall? Or would I be solely concentrating on making sure my precious baby comes out unscathed? You know, the stay-at-home-mom's version of Will I Be A Hero On The Battlefield? I'm proud to report that my one single thought whilst flying through the air was DON'T DROP MOLLY DON'T DROP MOLLY. I'd stepped on Jack's toy schoolbus, which slid across the floor, sending me up and over and sideways- not down the stairs, but close enough. I landed on a knee and a toe and a hip and an elbow and I am now turning purple in all of those places, but Molly was fine. Not even startled. My toe on the other hand, which I'm pretty sure I broke two-ish years ago and which didn't heal correctly, is super mad at me. Oh, and instead of cursing wildly and sobbing, like I wanted to, I sat there holding my toe and saying "OUCHIE" over and over so Jack wouldn't freak out. And then he must have put two and two together because he marched over and kissed my toe. AWWWW.

5. Tomorrow is Friday, which means visiting grandma, which means Jack might live to see the weekend. Save the toe-kissing moment, he's been so ORNERY this week. And, suddenly, very rough and antagonistic with Molly. Molly, however, has suddenly become touchy and sensitive re: the general direction of Jack's GAZE, so I try not to bark at him too much. I understand, Molly, (OH HOW I UNDERSTAND) but as the mom I am going to need both of you to SHUT IT.

6. I have, like, seven or eight little seedlings in my Jiffy peat pot tray. How awesome is that? Nothing in my garden box yet, but now I have these little sprouts for when the garden box inevitably fails me. It's so fun, I love it. I am really really hopeful I won't have to buy a single grocery store zucchini this summer.

7. The other day someone mentioned in the comments that she was a lurker from SLC (Salt Lake City? Right?) in case I was wondering about all my SLC hits. Which was sort of funny to me because I don't look at my stats and have no idea where anyone is from. You probably think that is a big fat lie, since "blogger" = "obsessed with stats" but it's true. It's also true that I have forty-seven different statcounter codes enbedded in my site and that I used to check my forty-seven different statcounters about ninety-seven times a day, BUT. I started to feel like I was holding ten tons of information without any idea how to use it, you know? I don't even understand half the LINGO. And then I went and had a second baby and I'm lucky if I get to post AND read YOUR posts, let alone count how many times the girl from SLC visited today. I figure if you're around, you'll say hi. Which I very much enjoy SO SAY HI WHY DON'T YOU. And tell me where you're from, because I admit I DO harbor a slight fear that some random chick on my street might be reading my website and I'm COMPLETELY OBLIVIOUS.

Go here to see other [undoubtedly more interesting] quick takes.

Comments

[Lindsay]

I'm totally afraid to say where I am from on the internet. Can't wait to get all brazen like SLC reader.

VERY cute story about the toe kiss.

[Corey]

I'm from New Orleans. And that's the only coherent comment I can put together at 6:43AM!

[Jenn]

OMG I can't stop watching Real Housewives! And I know I shouldn't watch the NJ one, but I know I'll end up getting sucked in. I already kind of want to slap one of them, is that a bad sign?

[Becky aka StinkyLemsky]

I'm from St. Louis. :)

[Carolyn]

Kansas City!

[Jenny Ryan]

Speaking from down here in Atlanta, I'm with you-I don't see any need for an entire reality show based on our brand of housewives.

[J. Johnson]

Aurora, IL - speaking of reality shows, have you ever watched the Travel Channel's No Reservations or Bizarre Foods? My daughter (age 11) is obsessed with those shows!

[Redbecca]

The captial of our Paranoid Nation. And I'm with Lindsay, what a cute story (and I'm sorry you are bruised up!)! I ripped my toenail off after smacking my foot into one of the feet on DS's high chair and didn't even NOTICE until I realized I was dripping blood on the carpet two rooms away. Sigh.

[Barbara]

waving frantically from Bel Air, Maryland!

[-R-]

My husband watches those UFC shows too. I feel your pain.

I am in Minneapolis. I have no idea what our real housewives would look like. Maybe they would be pushing their sons into hockey and arguing about which church is the best Lutheran church?

[Ashley]

Coming to you from the East/Gulf coast, in Tallahassee, Florida. Okay, a very tiny town in the Tallahassee AREA, but close enough. I have to say I love your use of the word "Prii".

[Shelby]

Hi Maggie! I'm Shelby from San Diego and I love your blog. Does blogger track the stats if we read your blog from a reader? I've always wondered that . . .

[Heather]

I have wondered the Reader thing as well.

Saying hi from Michigan!

[koko]

De-lurking in the NW corner of Arkansas (Fayetteville)!

Wow, I'd love to say something charming & witty for my first comment, but after bragging yesterday about Baby Boy sleeping all night for FIVE NIGHTS IN A ROW OMG! he decided to wake up every 2 hours last night. *sigh*

[Kels]

Love Real Housewives of NYC!

[Mary]

I also enjoyed the clever use of "Prii." I'm from Charleston, SC which might qualify for a Real Housewives show, but it would probably be a boring flop. There are some seriously uppity rich people around here. They all live in extremely OLD houses and try to fit Hummers down horse-drawn carriage size streets.

[Jess]

OMG cannot get over adorableness of toe kiss. See, repressing your desire to scream and cry totally paid off! Glad everyone's OK.

[morgan s]

Hello! Portland, Oregon in the house!

I tripped over the dog and fell while holding an infant Brooke. I miraculously missed by CENTIMETERS both the dining room table corners and the dining room chair. My kneecaps and elbows were wrecked, but Brooke landed on the floor, in my arms in the sitting position, completely fine. I still have flashes of OMG, what if I sneeze and trip and drop my second baby on the cement and crack her head open RIGHT NOW. Wierd.

Also...I hate UFC in all forms and my husband loves it. UGH.

The Real Housewives of Portland would be very similar to Seattle's. Except they might drink more craft beer....

[Lindzi]

Hello from...the british island of Bermuda (that's right, I'm not even in the US!). And in case you're not sufficiently amused, the hubs and I only work here - I'm South African. Have visited the US many times, not Seattle though, so no worries - i'm nowhere near you - haha. Usual hangouts are on the east coast- NY, Connecticut, Miami, Boston, and one time, there was that San Fran, LA and Vegas expedition, but i won't get into that cause what happens in vegas...

[Megan]

I'm from southern california. And we are goodreads friends. Hi Maggie!

[Manda]

There must be something in the water with the broke-ish toes around here.
Luckily my daughter is still to young to repeat every word I say so when I broke my toe this week I got to say every cuss word I could think of! WOO!

[Elsha]

Although I don't watch any of the Real Housewives shows, I also have quite the love affair with Bravo and my husband makes fun of me for it. His channel of choice? Cartoon network.

Also, I totally worry every time I come down the stairs with the baby that I will fall. I haven't yet, but I figure it's only a matter of time.

Lastly, this comment is coming from Midland TX. Although since I am in my office it will probably show up in your stats as Houston.

[Christiana]

Tampa Bay, FL!

Can you look at your stats? I have no idea how. So sad.

[Sonetka]

Um, that was me being all brazen :). And yes, SLC is Salt Lake City, and no, I'm not Mormon. I am, however, the mother of a three-year-old who also likes to "kiss make better!" whenever I bruise myself, so I totally get you on (1) the utter adorableness of it and (2) the way the same adorable child can drive you completely freaking NUTS the rest of the time :).

[Sara]

Chicago, IL...where the sun FINALLY shined today.

You know what happens when you fall down the stairs holding your six month old? You fall on his leg and BREAK IT. Yep. Been there, done that, and it's super fun when social services comes a-knocking to make sure you didn't do it on purpose. Good thing babies heal quickly and won't remember it at all. But you will remember...oh yes, you will.

[Kate P]

Oh my gosh, he kissed your toe. Hope it's all better now!

I think you know where I'm from--and hey, send me your address, because YOU WON THE GIVEAWAY!!! Yay! I'm gonna send you a nice little prize. :)

[Jessica]

Hi...Dallas, TX

I've been wondering what the plural of Prius is. Thank you for that.

[Corey]

I didn't think of this in my last comment since it was so early, but on Easter Sunday I smashed my toe on my coffee table leg.
As I fell on the couch in horrible pain, my 8 year old daughter brought me a frozen chicken breast to put on my foot for relief! It was really funny although I didn't appreciate it at the time!

[Jen]

Awww.

My dad once slipped on some sharp rocks by the water and broke his collarbone because he used both his hands to lift my sister safely into the air.

Lakeland, Florida. Between Tampa and Orlando. Close enough to Disney World that we are going tomorrow.

[Tracy]

prii?

of course, my cousin just sold her prius there at the end of her honeymoon driving throughout the west. The last stop was Seattle, where they sold the car, and got on a plane to Europe (since they are going to be living there for a while).

and I'm in Louisiana. if you didn't already know that.

[Stephanie]

A day late to this party, but I am a native Seattle-ite (until four years ago, and now I live in a village of 300 - yes, 300! - near Lourdes, France). My heart belongs in and to Seattle, however, and I visit often b/c that's where my entire fam is. If I saw you on the street, I would say "bonjour!" even though I rarely comment . . .

[sarahd]

Had to comment when I realized I am the only one from Alabama. Hi! We are not all hicks who talk funny! (Although many of us are.)

[MichelleRenee]

Sorry I'm late..

Life got in the way of my blog reading so I'm catching up.

Good Afternoon from Concord..ish
New Hampshire