Grossest post you'll find on this website

Last night my child barfed up his entire dinner.

(Oh wait. If you are not into things like children barfing up their pureed chicken and vegetable dinners, you can go read about my extreme lack of effort in the appearances department at Parenting. Bye!)

Anyway. It totally grossed me out. I think I have seen him barf only once before and it was, like, maybe a tenth as much barf as last night.

(Goodbye all my readers!)

And I was sitting there bragging to Phillip (can you brag to someone who would be bragging about the same thing?) about what a good EATER our boy is and how he has NEVER spit out ANY kind of food and how he would just sit in his high chair slurping up pears and avocado and sweet potatoes ALL DAY LONG if I let him. How we'll NEVER have any problems with foods and eating and then BAAAAAAARRRRRRFFFFFFF.

He'd been looking at me like, "Ugh, more cereal?" But I just thought that meant he wanted bananas or something. So I'm sitting there waving my spoonful of bananas and he gives me an apologetic look, opens his mouth and everything he ate comes POURING OUT.

Of course I reacted with calm and aplomb. By which I mean I started shouting, "OH NO! OH NO!" and Phillip came rushing up the stairs (he works from home on Wednesdays) to see which of us had died. He ended up cleaning up the high chair and the floor and the shoes (ick! the shoes!) while I took the baby upstairs to strip him and hose him down. Ugh, poor baby.

He is not sick often, can you tell? Nor does he throw up or do anything else that could be vaguely construed as gross. I mean, all babies have squicky diapers, but that's about as far as it goes with our kid.

UNTIL LAST NIGHT. Ugh. I sort of wish I had documented it with digital imagery, just for posterity. IT JUST KEPT COMING OUT.

I do hope you all have already eaten whatever meal it is that you should have eaten before you read this.

Comments

[Angela]

Oh, poor baby!! I hope he's feeling better!

Also, I think I hadn't noticed your masthead before this--hysterical!

[Lauren]

Wow...thats good for the diet.

We don't deal with barf that much here...it's usually the _other_ stuff. Which is way more disgusting. (hey, you started it)

Hope he feels better!

[Lisa]

SO NOT FUN. I'm sorry that your Jack is sick. But also very jealous about the never (otherwise) spitting up anything. Seriously, how do you accomplish that?

[Jess]

Oh, your poor baby! The apologetic look just kills me.

[Christina]

SO glad I read this before I ate breakfast!!
My oldest was huge on the spit up - after every bottle and most nursings she would spit back half of it. Gross and annoying, but especially so when we were walking through target and I had nothing to clean it up!
Poor baby - and poor you! Hope he's feeling better and that's your last puking incident for a good long time.

[Jen]

My dog once walked over to me on my chair (he's little) and then proceeded to throw up his entire weight in really disgusting stuff. It got in between the cushion of the chair too. I made my husband clean up all the chunky parts and then I proceeded to disinfect the entire chair. I have still never managed to figure out how he managed to store that much stuff inside himself before throwing it all up.

[Dooneybug]

Poor baby Jack! I totally envisioned that experience. I've so been there. But wait until barf turns into VOMIT. Now THAT is fun. Or not.

[Elaine]

I am sorry Jackson isn't feel well, but seriously? He's how old and this is the first time he's barfed? Wow. My first child managed to barf into MY mouth way before this age (and I am so not making that up). Hope he feels better soon!

[Kate P]

Oh, poor kiddo. He needs a gauge on his forehead that reads "full" so you can tell! And poor you, for the trauma!

If it makes you feel better, my brother and SIL are constantly hosing down their 2 youngest kids. For the other end.