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After some truly fabulous anxiety-free days, last night I hit myself with the trifecta of Late Night Church Meeting, Early Morning Board Meeting and Doctor Appointment At Which I Will Learn If The Baby Is Still In There. And while none of these things are anxiety triggers, the mere fact that I was verrrry stressed out about them told my body to shut down on the serotonin or whatever the heck it is that my brain chemistry does so poorly. Let's just say last night was not fun. And it's been a while since I haven't been able to fast forward the commercials during Conan.

I know that normal people do not get this stressed out about MEETINGS. Especially meetings where I am not responsible for anything. Basically I show up. Even for the board meeting. I'm not required to SAY anything or KNOW anything or do anything, really, except sit there and write down all the things I'm supposed to do before the next board meeting. None of my fellow meeters are intimidating or mean or scary or unknown or any of the typically anxiety-inducing things people can be. No, I'm pretty sure I get stressed about meetings because of time. Like, I had one and a half hours between work and my church meeting, and that's not really enough time to make dinner and watch Tuesday's Veronica Mars. And because my next meeting is so early, I'll have to go to bed early, but what if I don't fall asleep right away and I'm up late and I never sleep, or maybe I do fall asleep eventually, but I'm so tired I don't hear my alarm-

Yes. This is just a tiny little snapshot of the myriad of Neuroses fluttering around my brain.

Anyway, I think I got three hours of sleep. And for someone who needs, oh, nine or ten, that is not cool. I feel like crap and I'm still anxious, because now I'm not only worried about my appointment, I'm worried I won't be able to sleep tonight. Evil vicious cycle. But this is why God gave us Ambien.

JUST KIDDING. You can't take an Ambien after you've finished off a bottle of merlot! What is wrong with you?

The radio is playing 'Poison'. That makes me feel a little bit better. (Are you having a bad day? This will make you feel better. Promise.)

The church meeting went well. I have somehow turned into the Annoying Person Who Volunteers For Everything, Sometimes Without Even Being Asked. I have potentially become the chair of the not-quite-formed hospitality committee, and those of you who know me in real life, and have seen my horrific meeting-new-people skills in action, are permitted to guffaw. Go on. I'll wait.

The board meeting is a pain. Hopefully that is all going away soon, as I am about two thirds of the way up the Perfect Day Job Mountain. Cross your fingers.

The appointment... I'll let you know how that goes. Gah.

What I am most looking forward to is tonight, when my brother comes over for dinner, and we bust out GUITAR HERO. You know what I'm sayin' people. Phillip has been on a mission to find a PlayStation2 on craigslist. He finally found one, but then he went out and bought Guitar Hero and Guitar Hero 2 for actual money at an actual store. You don't even want to know how much those games cost. He told me when he picked me up last night, and I said, "EACH?" Let's just say our baby is not going to college.

He brought them to work. Because he's picking up the PlayStation on his lunch break, and he and his coworkers are going to rock out. With their boss. Because you get to do that kind of thing when you are a geek systems administrator working with fellow geeks system administrators at a geek software company. But you know what? I am so jealous. And I totally didn't freak out about Phillip buying the old Guitar Hero AND the new Guitar Hero, because DUH, we totally need 'More Than A Feeling'.

Oh! And I know I'm not allowed to say anything about Lost anymore, so I'll just say: DAMN YOU, JJ ABRAMS, FOR SUDDENLY MAKING THINGS INTERESTING. No more episodes till February! You suck. Although this gives Susan (hi Susan!) enough time to finish Season 2 already and get with the rest of America. Oh, and also? Mal! Yum.

Comments

[susan]

hahahahahahaha! :):)

[Maureen]

Was it interesting? I sort of fell asleep. But I woke up for the last five minutes or so, so I only missed about ten minutes. I couldn't help it; I have a new baby. (He fell asleep too.)

All I can say is that they'd better start tying up some storylines, and SOON. And also, what is up with the "Fall Season Finale"? "Fall Season"? The hell? The television rules I've always known are falling apart!

[Jen-Again]

OK- Ir ead this post much earlier in the day, and had to come back to tell you that I have been wandering around work ALL DAY singing 'That girl is POISON'. ARGH! But it was a funny clip.