More than meets the eye: dinner out with the Cheungs

When I was a kid and I dreamed about my future Knight In Shining Armor, I never, not for one instant, thought I would marry a man who would gaze at me lovingly and say: "Do you want to go see the Transformers movie with me?" And then, after completely ignoring the look of "surely you are joking" on my disbelieving face, would he add, "Of course, it doesn't come out till next summer, but it's going to be awesome!"

"Next summer?"

"Yeah, next summer. But the previews are out now!"

"You're asking me, right now, to see a movie that comes out next summer?"

"Well, it's going to be a big deal. The previews are out and everything. Like the X-Men movie! You liked the X-Men movie!"

He looked at me eagerly, twirling his pasta on his fork.

I said, "I'll go see the Transformers movie if you go see that dancing movie with me this weekend."

Phillip let out a long wounded sigh. "NEVER MIND THEN," he said into his plate and that was that.

So! Does anyone want to see the dancing movie with me this weekend?

(Oh hell, people. I just realized I linked to a My*Space page.)

The Transformers make me think of early Saturday mornings, overflowing bowls of cereal and world wars ignited over cartoons. These usually played out between my brother and me, as the other kids were either too small or not scary enough to get their way. We had some neutral shows- the Gummi Bears, Duck Tales, Alvin and the Chipmunks- but under no circumstances was my brother going to watch Jem and he was going to have to kill me before I agreed to watch the Transformers or that stupid turtle cartoon.

(By the way, he did try to kill me. Several times. But who broke whose collarbone? I THOUGHT SO. Maggie: 1. Alex: many attempts, but still, pathetically, 0.)

Phillip says he still has some Transformers. He's going to bring them back to our house the next time we visit his parents. I said, "Because you're going to sell them on Ebay and buy your wife something sparkly?" And he said, "No, I already BOUGHT you something sparkly [this is true -Ed.] and your account at the Bank of Sparkly is seriously depleted. Maybe you should make a deposit by giving me a back rub tonight." At which point I stopped whining and finished my dinner because Phillip ALWAYS wants back rubs and giving him a back rub is sort of like throwing your entire weight into a wall of elephant. Somewhat uneffective for him, rather unfun for me.

So we sat, unhappily, waiting for the slow-as-our-combined-grandmothers waitress to bring us the check. "I don't like this part," Phillip said. "I'm done eating. Now I want to go sit on the couch. And I can't, because I'm trapped in this vinyl booth surrounded by fake flowers and homey platitudes painted onto arts and craft store strips of wood. Can't you stand up and flag down the waitress?"

"Who am I? Your dad?" (People, I thought Phillip's dad was a waitress's worst nightmare, until I went to China, where sticking your hand up and waving it spastically until the waitress sees your distraught state is the nicest way of getting her attention. After my trip to China, Phillip's dad makes waaaaay more sense.)

"I'm TIRED. I want to go HOME."

"Wah."

"I hate being held hostage by restaurants."

"It's your own fault. When she came by to pick up our plates, you should have said 'Yes, I'm all finished' instead of smiling sweetly and telling her that you're still grazing over what's left of my dinner."

What was that about being nice to my husband on my website? Well. Obviously THAT'S over with.

Comments

[Jenn]

My husband almost bought himself a Transformer last year until he realized they were made out of plastic and not metal, like they were when we were kids and apparently that ruined Transformers for him. I think he would still have them if his mom hadn't thrown them all away.

[baggage]

My brother had all the transformers. Geo spent like 1000 on a arcade game he liked when he was young. I don't get it.

[Angela]

1. I heart dancing movies

2. Dude, you can't make fun of MySpace, for I also have an unexplainable obsession with it.

and

3. When I was in 3rd grade my grandmother bought my sister and me coloring books--my sister's was a hugeass compendium of every Disney princess created up to that point in time. Mine was the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I still don't really understand that.

[Antonia]

awww!! He knows you love him really!

funny post!! :-)

[Lindsay]

Ouch. You broke his collarbone? Remind me to never mess with you over control of the TV!

Haha. It's always me bribing my boyfriend for backrubs (when he visits or vice versa). They help me fall asleep better, and if I can't sleep, then I get up and go poke him on the floor until he wakes up to talk to me or rub my back so I can fall asleep. I always rationalise it that it'd be easier for both of us in the long run if he'd just rub my back. :o)

[Maureen]

I totally want to see the dancing movie. Even though I'm sure it's really really stupid. But dancing! For a higher purpose! To pull themselves out of poverty! Or something!

Hey, have you seen _Camp_? It's an independent film about kids at a summer musical theater camp. They do tons of songs from famous musicals, and there's also a plot of some kind. It's awesome.

[Sean]

Dude! I am totally with Phillip on this one. Sorry Maggie, but Tranformers ROCK! I used to brag when I was a kid about my 100+ collection of morphing vehicles, tools, and monsters of all sorts. Oh! the memories...

Phil, I know you don't read the blog much, but you can count me in for the new movie. You, me, and the posse, 7.4.7 at the Cinerama, baby. And a merry posse it will be!