The Great Pumpkin Massacre

It started out innocent enough.

But then...

[The internet needs to know that not only am I Oh So Photogenic, I am also wearing the oldest piece of clothing I own, my Model Senate t-shirt from my senior year of high school. Model Senate, at least when I was in school, was a yearly event in which over 100 students attending high school on American military bases traveled to a German resort hotel for three days of drinking, pot smoking, making out, and occasionally passing the odd bit of legislation. The big bill that year was whether Coke or Pepsi was to be the Official American Soft Drink. And by the way, all of this is funded by you, the American Taxpayer. I won't tell you where else I got to travel on your dime.]

I carved two pumpkins in the time it took these girls to carve ONE. Of course, these girls also took actual ART classes in high school while I was gallivanting about my hotel resort, so it's possible their pumpkins turned out a bit better than mine.

Katie REALLY REALLY WANTED the BIG KNIFE.

This is Phillip's contribution to the evening:

pumpkin-sitting while I carved a second one. That second pumpkin I carved? It was HIS. Big lazy pumpkin-carving-spirit-killer.

And here they are:

Mine are rotting already.

[Hey, what's that song about the five little pumpkins? Shoot! How does it go?!?! Rats. This is what you get when your mother is also a First Grade Teacher: a brain full of silly songs and rhymes that are only useful for amusing yourself on long car rides and so that your husband can look at you like you are CRAZY and say, "Uh, crazy person, WHAT are you singing about?" And you can say, "The five little pumpkins! Don't you know the five little pumpkins? Everyone knows about the five little pumpkins!" Even though you are VERY MUCH AWARE that only YOU and your crazy first grade teacher mother and the other two girls who grew up with you know about the five little pumpkins. And, I suppose, a few former first graders scattered around the country. Oh! Now I've thought of two whole other topics- Poignant Halloween Memories and How My Husband's Life Will Forever Be Incomplete Because He Does Not Know ONE SINGLE Nursery Rhyme. Hmmm.]

Anyway, if you walk by my apartment at night you will see my two little pumpkins glowering at you from their perch on the dining room table. It'd be creepy, except they are SUPER CUTE. They are decidedly less "BOO!" and much more "I am FULL of candy!"

Comments

[Becca]

Five Little Pumpkins

Five little Pumpkins sitting on a gate.
The first one said "My, it's getting late."
The second one said, "There are witches in the air."
The third one said, "But we don’t care."
The forth one said, "We’ll run and run and run."
The fifth one said, "It's just Halloween fun."
"Whooooo" went the wind.
And out went the light.
And the five little pumpkins rolled out of site.