I interrupt this three-day weekend to tell you: I AM ROCKING IT.
I dug up ALL the overgrownness in my front yard, weeded it, stared at it for a really long time, and decided that what I really needed was a whole bunch of Large Bushy Plants to fill in the bare dirt areas. I thought about going to Home Depot or Costco and buying up whatever was cheap and big, but I have a CRAP TON of plants in the backyard that are driving me insane. There's this huge area, sectioned off with decorative bricks and two by fours, that possibly, at one time, was a pretty flower garden, but is now just a giant mess. It WAS full of hostas and irises, but as of today I have transplanted ALL of those into the front yard. I don't like hostas OR irises, but they take up space, they come back year after year, and they are FREE. I still have two peonies, an ugly rosemary bush, and two unidentified flowering plants stuck in that flower bed in the backyard, all of which must go. The peonies I plan to gently and lovingly place in some undecided spot, the rosemary bush as well, and I'm just going to throw out the other plants because they're SO unattractive, even with the flowers. Besides, that whole area is going to have to be redone once we put the stairs in off the deck, so I have to transplant things anyway. I'm feeling very brilliant about this whole arrangement and even mulch-less and sporting half-falling-over transplanted irises, my front yard looks a trillion times better.
I promised Jack I'd "play baseball" with him after I did all my digging. So I grudgingly went out to make good on my promise and DUUUUDE, my kid can hit a ball! I did not know this! I was even able to tweak his stance and give him advice on how to swing and he TOOK MY ADVICE (GASP) and hit a ball over our (admittedly short and picket-like fence) and PRIDE, BURSTING, ETC. So much so that I almost immediately took him to Fred Meyer and bought him a REAL bat and ball (we were just using a whiffle bat) and I am thisclose to signing up to coach Little League. (HA. THAT IS A JOKE.)
Last night after the kids went to bed I hung out with some friends eating chocolate covered strawberries, which I already know I like, and baby carrots, which I think are vile and the devil's preferred vegetable. I HATE RAW CARROTS!!! Except! Last night I was shoveling them into my mouth as fast as possible thanks to an unbelievably high fat concoction called Uncle Dan Ranch Dip. BOW DOWN BEFORE IT. It's this packet of ranch dip mix whisked into one cup of sour cream and one cup of mayo and it is so delicious that it even makes raw carrots palatable. Of course I immediately bought a packet for myself today and I've been chowing down on carrots and snap peas all evening AND! AND! AND! my kids are too! When you are a parent who does not love vegetables it's hard to figure out how to get your kids to eat them. But JACKSON CHEUNG IS EATING A SUGAR SNAP PEA AS I TYPE. I know that ranch dressing has been a parenting tool since it's existence, but I never have it around (OR dip-friendly raw veggies if I'm being honest) so this is a freaking COUP people. (ALSO: LOW CARB. SCORE.)
I suppose this weekend hasn't been a TOTAL success - my attempt at putting EJ to sleep unswaddled was, shall we say, Amusing. As in, EJ was HIGHLY AMUSED. I'm trying not to get super discouraged about this. I HAVE done it twice before. I know it will happen eventually. I will not be swaddling her and rocking her to sleep in college. But MAN is it getting old right now. JUST ROLL OVER, FTLOG!
In other (very! important!) news, I was able to shoehorn my butt into a pair of Old Jeans. Namely, the jeans I wore to the Original Blathering, mere months after my Hot By Thirty finale. I can button those jeans! THAT SAID! I should not wear them in public! And I certainly cannot wear a shirt that is the slightest bit fitted at the waist for fear of exposing the impressive amount of muffintop BUT I CAN BUTTON THEM AND WOO HOO LET'S CELEBRATE WITH RANCH DIP!!!
I still have one day left to go and I am SO excited to tell you that I plan to spend it perusing the aisles of a brand new HOME GOODS that cropped up dangerously close to my in-laws house. The internet recommends that store so often that I have been INCENSED not to have one near by but NOW! I DO! Tomorrow I will spend all the money! And this concludes the dumbest post EVER!