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THIS is the last day of summer

In which my imaginary kitchen cabinets become a metaphor

I was just overcome by a giant burst of Productivity, and instead of doing the dishes or cleaning my room or getting caught up on laundry, I sorted and reorganized my giant stash of gift bags and tissue paper. For yes, I am one of Those People. I do indeed save wrapping paper, ribbons, nice shopping bags, pretty much anything I can use again, and for the last several years I've been stuffing it all into this enoooormous Storables shopping bag with a giant rip down one side. 

Anyway, I decided to haul it all out of the big closet downstairs and bring it upstairs into the Multipurpose Room Off The Kitchen That I Still Don't Know How To Organize because it's a huge pain going to that closet every time I need to wrap a present. Over the last year I've been slowly moving all my crafty supplies upstairs to the Room That Has No Name. For someone who isn't terribly crafty I have LOTS of craft supplies. It's all more useful to me up here and I don't have to get angry every time I go downstairs and see that Someone (AHEM) has totally destroyed whatever semblance of organization I set up in the storage spaces downstairs. 

But I am telling you all this because I need to know how you deal with House Functionality Issues. Especially when you have a Grand Plan but you can't execute it yet because the kids are too young. FOR EXAMPLE. That downstairs bedroom and closet will one day house my two girls and all the junk we keep down there will have to go somewhere else ANYWAY. The fact that my two girls will not be moving in together any time soon does not keep me from trying to figure out where everything is going to go. It actually makes me crazier because I can't just DO IT. 

A few weeks ago I think I told you I spent hours on the Ikea kitchen planner and mapped out exactly what I want to do with our kitchen. At some point. When we win the lottery. Because even an Ikea kitchen will require lottery winnings at this point. (REMEMBER WE BOUGHT A DECK? SIGH.) Well, now I've decided that I need to have ANOTHER wall of kitchen cabinetry to line the back wall of the Family Room Or Is It A Breakfast Area off the kitchen. Right now it's just an empty space. And I like it that way. Most people, when I start yammering on about my kitchen, think I'm going to incorporate it INTO the kitchen. But I love that extra space (at least right now) for kid projects and kid meals and parties and Christmas cookie prep and roman shades DIY and anything else we decide it's for. What it doesn't have is storage. What I want is a wall of cabinets that match what we'll pick out for the kitchen. One big cabinet for brooms and mops and cleaning supplies (WE HAVE NO PLACE FOR A BROOM IT DRIVES ME INSANE) and the rest just shelving for all the Extra Nonsense I have lying around up here. Craft supplies, wrapping supplies, my grandmother's china, the serveware I only get out for the Christmas party, table linens, candles, vases. I could move all the stuff in the buffet into these cabinets, get rid of my buffet, and have a more spacious dining area. 

And I want to do this NOWWWWWWWWW. 

I am really super not good at holding off on things. And it's not like I'm banging down Phillip's door to go to Ikea tomorrow or anything. I KNOW a few years of savings are required. I just can't STAND having a solution that I can't implement! I can think of other solutions, but it feels wasteful somehow to spend money on a second choice solution when I already know what the IDEAL is. 

You are all rolling your eyes right now, aren't you. I get it. I understand. Patience has never been one of MY virtues. 

Did I tell you my roman shades are a bust? I've made three out of the four and they ARE super cute and that elephant fabric IS the cutest fabric in the world BUT. The shades themselves are CRAPOLA. I accidentally cut the string on one of them, which YES I was furious with myself blah blah blah. I fixed it though and hung it up, only to realize that the second string on the same shade is on its last thread. So I can't use them. And I am so DISGUSTED. This is how I feel about most of my attempts at House Fixing Up. Good idea, poor execution, ridiculous outcome. God help us if we ever decide to go ahead and retile our own shower. 

Oh, don't get me started on the bathroom and the $30K of work our contractor said it would require. HA HA HA. 

Why am I fixating on this right now?! This has been a very weird day. Towards the end I realized that most of it, I think, has to do with the fact that Jack started school but Molly didn't. It's like my kitchen plan. I know what's going to happen and how great it will be, and it's so frustrating in the meantime because I can't just DO what I wanna DO. It's felt pointless to get into a new routine when the Molly factor isn't in place, but this whole time I've been SO FOCUSED on getting to that place. You know? I don't do well in in between spots. 

And I know. It's only a few days. Clearly not something to get bent out of shape about. Except I am, and I didn't mean to and I don't want to, but I AM and it's hard and GAWD I'm just ready to start the new normal already. 

Comments

Morgan s

I have been working from home with the kids for the last three days while husband has been on a business trip. And it is raining, and the first week of school AND THE FIRST WEEK OF NEW PUPPY. I am losing my mind. One kid at school, one kid not starting school till next Monday and a never ending mess of kids..house...dog. Brain and patience = kablooey. And we are 4 months into the new house and nothing is done or right or finished and I AM SO TIRED. No new furniture or ANYTHING until the kids and puppy are older...much older. Because they ruin everything. I can see the house 5 years from now and it will be lovely. But I want it now!!!! NOW!!!! All this to say, I so understand.

HereWeGoAJen

This is how I feel about my house. I have so many good ideas! But the money and the execution! This is why I keep daydreaming about being on one of those shows where they redo everything for you for free.

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