Rules For Me
I know this is hard, very hard, but please TRY to remember that [lots of good, dark] chocolate in the morning makes you feel HORRIBLE for the rest of the day. Anxiety + nausea + shaky + terrified the meds stopped working = someone had caffeine for breakfast. Other people listen to their bodies and make adjustments. MAYBE YOU CAN TOO, FTLOG.
Wait a day before posting that blog post you think is going to earn you accolades and retweets far and wide. Maybe even just wait an HOUR. These are the posts that, as soon as you hit publish, give you nervous tummy for Trying To Write About Something Meaningful. Maybe just don't write these at all. People seem to like bats. Maybe get a pet bat for blog fodder.
Wait a day before posting that blog post you think is going to get you dozens of "YOU'RE HILARIOUS!" comments, because those are the posts that no one comments on. Better yet, don't post it.
Don't wait for your husband to stop tinkering with his computer and come upstairs to go to bed. Go to sleep NOW. Your baby will wake up at three and your husband, who went to bed at two, won't be much help.
You are the only person who feels guilty and thinks you are a self-indulgent terrible wife/mother for flitting about the country visiting internet friends. So stop it.
No one is as interested in your war books as you are. Maybe stop telling everyone what you're LEARNING.
Don't read the news story about the violent attack on women. Don't look at pictures of concentration camp victims. Don't watch the war documentary. Don't get sucked into news about a national tragedy involving children. Just don't. Find other ways to honor those people.
Err on the side of being weird and chatty in groups of people (and you will be weird, since you are not naturally chatty) instead of hanging back and listening. Even if you are simply hanging back and listening, EVERYONE will think you are a cold standoffish you know what. And you are not! You are nice! You are just socially inept! Better to be thought weird than mean, eh?
You are not a bad person if your bathroom is dirty.
You are not a bad person if you eat chocolate chips for breakfast. (Just dumb.)