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    February 12, 2013

    Kindergarten homework

    IS STUPID. Seriously! Who knows what that picture is! WE HAVE NO IDEA. Today we were trying to figure out the begnning and ending sound of a word, three letters, middle letter E, with a picture of... a paint brush? In a puddle of paint?  Ten minutes later Phillip shouted, "RED! It's a black and white copy! RED! RED!"

    Then there was a picture of a diamond. Blank E BLANK. Gem, right? It's gem. What kindergartner knows the word gem? GEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS IS NOT ON ANYMORE.

    Jack said, "I think it's JEWEL," and then Phillip says, "no, I think it's GEM. JEWEL has too many letters."

    So then Jack asks, "How do you spell JEWEL?" 

    Phillip says, "J - E - W - L." 

    And I say, from the kitchen where I am bent over a sink full of dirty dishes, wiping the sweat from my brow, realizing that not only must I cook the meals and do the dishes I must also be responsible for ALL THE SPELLING: "OH. MY. GAWD. PHILLIP CHEUNG. J-E-W-E-L."

    "Oh right," Phillip says. 

    "How come you don't know how to spell JEWEL," Jack asks. "You must not be a grown up." 

    I KNOW, JACK. I KNOW. 

    Oh, as I'm typing this, Jack, who is still doing his homework, comes over to me shouting, "THIS DOESN'T MAKE SEEEEEEENSE!!!"

    I look over it and say, "I don't understand. Everything's right. You did a good job."

    He goes, "But WHY do I have to do six plus one so many TIMES when I already KNOW IT?"

    #snotbrat

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    Comments

    This may be my favorite post of yours. Ever. Too funny (and really, homework in Kindergarten!)

    Maggie, Maggie, Maggie. I had to click over from Reader to correct you, because it is not GEM and the Holograms, it is JEM and the Holograms. AND she is truly outrageous. Don't ever forget that: Truly, truly, truly outrageous.

    Oh good, someone has already pointed out Jem and the Holograms. Also, I think that you should come up with a list of words that "red" could be. Wet? I bet the paint was wet. Set? Had it dried? Because then it would be set. And I can't think of any more, so this is a bad idea.

    But kindergarten homework is dumb, and it is even dumber if it takes an adult and a kid to do it, and it is even dumber if it has been reproduced in a way that makes it impossible to do without an ouija board.

    I cannot tell you how many stick figures with things like "JAN" on the dress. Hint! The answer is Jan! It's right there!

    And my girls are totally perplexed. As am I.

    This is the point when I'm grateful that all Kalena's "homework" sheets are in color. But yes with the alternate words- picture of an "automobile" on the words that start with "a" page? Come on. Every 4 year old ever is going to call that a CAR.

    Recently we had a homework page from the third grade class get stapled in the first grade packet by a volunteer. The teacher didn't want to hurt feelings so she left it AND didn't send a note home. Omg! I was so confused why I was teaching multiplication and division my kid obviously had NEVER seen before.

    I had so many friends in school who were like Jack, perplexed why they had to keep showing off how smart they were.

    I, on the other hand, was compelled to follow every rule and complete every assignment perfectly. I kind of hope my kids are a little less eager to please.

    This post made me laugh out loud!

    The pre-kinder homework Sophie has twice a week drives me similarly crazy. Can totally relate.

    Thanks for the chuckles.

    This is awesome. Emery has homework in PRESCHOOL and it kind of makes me rage-y. Last night she was adding and subtracting. IN PRESCHOOL. I want her to have a good education. I want her to get ahead but sweet mother. Homework in PRESCHOOL. Every night.

    Like Sonya I also LOLed after reading this. Thanks for the laugh!

    Homework is stupid. But this was hilarious.

    My kinderdgartener has BOOKREPORTS to do. Arg!

    I completely relate to this. They're trying to expand the kiddo's vocabulary, but they're doing it with words *NObody uses anymore!* That used to drive me crazy when the kids had a homework page like that and after much confusion we'd finally discover what the word was supposed to be, and I'd get so aggravated, because what kid was ever going to know that word?! Ah well.

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