And now it's Me vs. the Squirrels
Sucked it up and planted my stupid garden today. Two weeks ago (ie: the last time it was sunny) I dug a rectangle out of the overgrown lawn in what I have determined is the sunniest part of the yard. Today I dug out a bigger rectangle, then I scavenged some of those ugly scalloped edger bricks from random parts of the yard and blocked it off. This was so it would look less like a random hole in the lawn. It helped, a little.
Then I dumped two bags of potting soil on top of the existing dirt and mixed it all up with a rake. If that was pointless and/or stupid, don't tell me, I felt like I was Priming My Soil.
THEN I walked around my front and backyards looking for some kind of trellis for my pole beans. The chunk of dug out yard happens to be right up against the house, so I just needed something to prop against the wall. And the outside of the house, much like the inside of the house, is full of Random Items Left By The Previous Owners. Like an entire shed full of garden tools. Anyway, there are a ton of overgrown never-pruned vines all over this yard and I picked the ugliest one and stole its trellis. I propped that sucker against the house and planted my pole beans beneath it.
At that point I had to make a decision: plant ALL the tomato plants or just the ones that DIDN'T appear to have a leaf-eating disease. What happened? They've all been sitting on the deck for a week and I've watered them and placed them in the sun, but three out of the five look like I should just toss them in the yard waste bin. I decided to only plant the good ones (which happen to be the cherry tomato plants.) (Which happen to be the only ones that ever turn out for me anyway.)
I also planted zucchini and cucumbers. If I had one of my previous gardens I would also have lettuce and snap peas and various vegetables that would die before anything really grew: squashes, melons, peppers, eggplant, that one time I tried to grow a pumpkin and it never turned orange. (The kids were super impressed with that one, let me tell you.)
Anyway, I'll tiptoe out there tomorrow morning and see if anything's left. I regularly see cats and raccoons visit my backyard and I'm pretty sure the fir tree houses an entire colony of squirrels. I'm just going to call this a practice year. I'm going to be living here for years and years. I will have plenty of other summers to attempt the Best Garden Ever.
In the meantime I have some sort of itchy nasty rash all over my forearm and, I swear, about three dozen miniscule slivers in my right ring fingertip. Something went awry with my gardening gloves, but still - what is in the dirt that makes my arm so itchy? And just THAT arm? And how in the WORLD did I get so many slivers in my finger? I thought at first it was just dirty and I needed to scrub a little harder, but then I looked closer and NO, those are ITTY BITTY SLIVERS OWWWWIEEEE.
I suppose I should be doing one of my various stationery-related tasks for my sister's wedding (in less than a month) (HOLY CATS) OR I should be figuring out my Blathering plane tickets (HAVE YOU?) OR I should be folding laundry OR doing something quasi-productive but no, I see that there are new episodes of Drop Dead Diva on Netflix.
Just wanted to update you on the Garden Decision. I know you were anxious. ALSO: here's an update on yesterday's "do I wake a sleeping baby?" post. EJ woke up, entirely her own, at exactly 10pm. Perhaps she read the blog? She sucked down a bottle, played while I window shopped on the internet, and easily went back to bed at 11pm. And then woke up at 4:30am. I am never going to sleep all night again, am I.