Waiting it out

Right now I'm cooking oatmeal, though it's been so long I've completely forgotten HOW to cook oatmeal, and then I'm going to feed it to Emma before bedtime because I need to feel like I'm doing SOMETHING about her rotten sleeping habits. Actually, "habits" is not the right word since she's completely unpredictable. Two nights ago she slept through, last night she was up from 2:30 to 4:30. Fun times!

I won't bore you with the technical details of the unpredictable sleep - you've read them all before, and probably in this very place. SNORE. (Ha! There is no snoring around here! Not from ME anyway! *eyes Phillip maliciously*)

We are STILL swaddling her and I KNOW but THAT IS HOW WE GET HER TO SLEEP. Phillip wants to do some sort of unswaddled boot camp this weekend and I am, of course, dreading it. I've taken a sort of hands off approach to sleep, mainly because, with all three of my kids, nothing we did seemed to have any effect. We did have Jack cry it out around seven months, but I remember having to redo it three or four times afterwards. Molly was our best sleeper, but you remember me writing about how she refused to GO to sleep until midnight? Horrible! But there was nothing WE could do. My big strategy for things like this is Wait It Out. 

But you can't wait out unswaddling. That is something I actually have to do. LAME. 

Phillip, if you are interested, takes an opposite approach. LET'S TRY ALL THE THINGS. (AND FIGHT ABOUT THEM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.) 

I think one thing that's been hard about Baby Number Three is the fact that Babies Number One and Two were decidedly NOT babies anymore. We were completely out of the baby stage. I didn't think this was a big deal, as I adore babies and loved the infant stage and wept over my babies getting older each month. BUT IT IS REALLY STINKING HARD. Abiding by the nap schedule (well, what little nap schedule we have), the separate feeding, the immobility, the waking up all night, even the stupid bucket seat - it's hard to go back. I'm just saying. There's definitely a part of me that thinks this would have been easier had we had Emma a little sooner, when we were still in the thick of baby/toddlerness and still used to the drill. But then I might have had three under three or three under four and I have no doubt that would have entailed a whole different set of parenting woes. 

GO EASY ON YOUR POOR MOTHER!

But anyway. 

I'm also having somewhat of a rough time with Jack and I can't figure out what to do about THAT either, except Wait It Out (And Attempt Consistency In The Meantime). I'll be the first to say that I am a less than stellar disciplinarian. I'm bad at consistency, I forget what I said before, I'm not too methodical, and every time I send him to a corner it's a DIFFERENT corner which I think is pretty indicative of my discipline practices right there. CANNOT DECIDE WHAT TO DO! WILL TRY IT ALL! 

But lately it seems like Jack just flits from one thing-I-don't-want-him-to-do to another-thing-I-don't-want-him-to-do. Don't manhandle Emma. Don't bang on the piano. Don't throw pillows at your sister. No, you can't have a snack. Stop shouting. Don't jump on the couch. Don't hang on the chair. Don't tip the chair back. Don't sit that way in the chair. Clean up the markers. No, you can't have the iPad. ALL! DAY! LONG! Even on preschool days, the minute he gets home he's causing problems with his sister. (Who, I have to admit, has the sensitivity of the Princess and the Pea and is constantly in tears ANYWAY.)

Today I instituted some Snack Rules, which I know I should have done a long time ago I KNOW, because I cannot I CANNOT! deal with the incessant asking for snacks. He responded pretty well to that, so now I'm wondering if I should go around Instituting Official Rules for everything. Except I thought we already HAD rules about manhandling babies and jumping on furniture. So maybe not. 

Sometimes I think I am just dealing with a case of Five-Year-Old [Noisy] Boy and there's really nothing to be done about THAT. Sometimes I think I need to give him more to do, more projects and activities, more structure. Except HECK NO, KIDDO. The last thing I want is Jack following me around all day demanding I provide him with his next ACTIVITY. He already does that with my mother. 

Phillip came home a whole hour early today and all three rushed him and left me alone, so there's really no need for all this self-pity. 

 

Comments

[Sarah in Ottawa]

I am struggling with the 'constant need to give the children activities' to do. Am DREADING preschool ending, I have to say. Good thing that the shaded park is 200 m from my back door...

Both my guys LOVED their swaddles, but got to the point where they were busting out and it was pointless. We moved them to just (lightweight) sleep sacks and that seemed to help. Their feet were still immobilized and I imagine that it gave them the sensation of being swaddled. Heck - they'd broken out of the swaddles already, so they were used to having their arms free!

I'm hoping that all goes well this weekend. Also - that picture in the tub is the cutest thing ever.

[craftyashley]

I love hiding behind "the rules." It makes them much less mad at me, which is awesome. Sorry kids! It's the RULES! And we don't want to get into some trouble with a vague authoritarian figure who is most importantly, not me. Haha!

[Erica]

Maybe you've said already, and I'm sorry if I missed that, but why do you have to stop swaddling EJ? Is there some pediatrician-mandated stop swaddling stage? (to which I say screw it unless she's in danger of strangling herself) Or is she just too big for the blanket? (maybe try cutting down an old sheet and using that?) Or are you just tired of swaddling her?

[Hillary]

1. Your children are too stinking cute. (Self preservation. God is smart.)

2. Is that the rug covering up the hole in the carpet? I think that little nooky area looks lovely.

3. I was throwing a little pity party for myself last night because all I do is YELL at the children, they're going to remember me as Screaming Momma, I am a horrible, impatient, bad-tempered person, etc. I vowed to be better. And then this morning, I was rushing around so much to get the kids out the door, I broke into a sweat and barked at the kids. You're not alone, is what I'm saying.

[Lisa]

I feel a little bit of excited nervousness about baby #2 coming NOW, when Olivia is approaching five and can dress herself and take a shower alone and sleeps in undies and can make her own meal (not that she's ALLOWED to make her own meal, because if she were it would consist of cheese sticks and lemon cookies). But, heck, that won't stop us when the time comes to welcome baby #2...sleepless nights and all. I reserve the right to complain on my blog too!!

[HereWeGoAJen]

Elizabeth was swaddled for a hundred years. It was great. I wish I could still do it to her.

[Christiana]

I need the official maggie Snack Rules. Because OMG, I am SO sick of Fuss constantly snacking all morning/afternoon and it DRIVES ME BONKERS.
Thanks. :)

["Cookie"]

Came across your blog from Twitter..... I am a mom to 3. Just reading this first post I wanted to shout with joy. Shout that I am not the only person with 3 kiddos that feels a little crazy. My boys are 4, 2, and 3 months. I was just telling a friend today I had to make myself stop and just hug & kiss all over the boys today. It was one of those days when every sentence began with no or don't. I want to be a fun, loving mother but I refuse to raise little hellions. It's hard!!.... The one thing I am hardcore about is our bedtime schedule. Baths, night time snack and bed take place at the same time each night. This is for ALL our sanity!

[A'Dell]

We just stopped swaddling Charlotte like, a few weeks ago. She liked it! I saw no reason to quit.