I wanted a better story
Not a bad way to start another year

On houses and bath time

NO I'm not going to FRB's show tonight! Sheesh. 

I am actually Single Parenting tonight. The kids are in the bathtub and I am perched on the toilet seat, shielding the laptop from errant splashes. There is no situation like Bath Time to show me that I am the laziest mother on earth, you guys. Basically I do not care what they do in the bath tub as long as they are 1) not fighting and 2) not drowning. Like, I have told them about forty-seven times not to drink the bath water, not to slurp the bath water, not to put their MOUTHS in the stupid WATER. But they keep doing it and I think to myself, "At least they are not 1) fighting or 2) drowning." And I go on with my typing. 

For those of you aghast that I am Blogging Whilst Bathing, I have my feet kicked up on the tub. I have negative twelve feet to cross to whisk anyone out of any precarious position. I'm pretty sure I would even throw the beloved laptop aside if action were required. 

I don't see how I can feel like it's been a long week when we were on VACATION on Monday and it's also not even Friday. That's three whole days of parenting for me, and two of those days contained large amounts of Other People Entertaining My Kids. The Bride was up here this week with her new husband and if I hadn't had such a great time I'd be embarrassed of how much we ditched the kids with New Husband so we could talk. So we're sitting in a park and snacking on Rainier cherries while New Husband kicks a ball around or takes them to throw rocks in the lake. Or we're hanging out at the table finishing giant slices of chocolate cake while New Husband plays hide and seek in the backyard. "But he LOVES kids!" she kept saying. Worked for me!

Maybe it was just today that felt long. We had no plans, no one to see, no errands to run. We went for a long walk in the morning, but Jack ruined it by acting out in the grocery store where we stopped to buy fancy overnight pull ups. (PSA: do not use swim diapers in place of pull ups. Just go to the store and buy some more. Unless you like laundry, that is. I hate laundry.) So he was a brat and I used my Mean Mommy voice and then he started to howl, in public, and I managed not to die until we were safely back on the trail, away from People Whose Children Always Behave. 

But the repercussions meant Jack was remorseful enough to behave through "quiet time" and the rest of the afternoon. There were sprinklers and peaches and running around in underpants. It's not supposed to stay this warm, so we tried to take advantage. Even if "advantage" sometimes means watching back to back episodes of Sesame Street in the basement where things are twenty degrees cooler. 

It's days like these, even with the Mortifying Grocery Store Episode, that make me think I couldn't possibly be doing anything else. 

While the kids ate dinner with Elmo, I trolled Redfin for an in-advisably long time. The prices are dropping, making me in-advisably optimistic. We're not planning to buy any time soon, and we intend to be exceedingly picky when we do, but it doesn't hurt to look, right? Quite a few oldish-but-updated houses popped up - the kind I like, in neighborhoods I love. Of course it'd be a major stretch to afford those, but I looked at them anyway, favorited them anyway. 

I hate the kitchen floor in this house. I loathe it. Every time I sweep it I think: if this were MY house this stuff would be ripped up in a FLASH. But then I remind myself that it's not my house and, therefore, not my problem. And something about that makes the permanent dirtiness more manageable. Same with the lack of dining room, the ugly carpet, the awful front door, the laundry room, the claustrophobic shower and the losing battle I am fighting with the weeds in the backyard. The fact that these are not my problems to own makes them infinitely more bearable. It also makes hunting around on Redfin a frequent event. What WOULD the house-that-is-all-mine look like? 

I can wait, though. I don't need to be responsible for discolored marked up kitchen floors any time soon.

And oh look, SOMEONE is trying to drink the water AGAIN.

Comments

A'Dell

I have to say, I am very jealous of the home buying position you guys are in. If I was the sort of person who could have stood renting and another whole year of uncertainty in terms of rates and availability, (and MOVING TWICE KILL ME) we would have done that. Didn't make sense for us.

But now, look at you! All the hard work is done! You have all the cash and you are just LOOKING. It's like you're a wolf looking for your prey and you'll be patient because you don't have to eat for ANOTHER YEAR.

That's so awesome. If you ever want to send me dreamy listing to pick over like the snob I am, I'm game!

The only thing I hate about my house are the columns in the kitchen. Everything else is fine until I figure out how to fix it. But still, it's intimidating. It must be nice to be like, "whatever, I so don't own that."

PS Bathtime at my house is basically the same. You're in the water? That means you're clean now.

Elsha

Ah bath time. I am pretty good about following through, so I make sure never to threaten to take her out of the tub for drinking the water. I just tell her a million times to knock it off.

Angela Noelle

I'm just having a good giggle at the fact that 1) not fighting came before 2) not drowning. Hee!

morgan s.

I am impressed with bathtime blogging. If I tried that it would look lie "Today was good day, the children only repeated "mommy" 450 tiimes instead of 1,000 tim5$3249#:::::::...argh, don't hit, stop screaming, stop trying to get out of the tub:$(%$9$% Don't flop the wet washcloth on me...no, no, NONONONO, too late, Mommy is soaked and NOT HAPPY and you know how DADDY likes to lecture about water on the floor...where is Daddy??? "checking his work email downstairs" grumble grumble....!!!!!ZOMG!!!!!".

so...props to you at writing a functional post at bathtime.

Christiana

Oh, yes, my daughter gets "splash time" in the tub after I've done all the shampooing/scrubbing and I read a book while purchased on the toilet lid while she splashes. It's the only way I can survive bathtime (unless my husband does it. Then, all is well!)

-R-

I do not even try to stop my kid from drinking the bathwater anymore.

It's hard not to look at expensive houses. I think renting was so smart for you guys right now.

Jess

I often find that four-day weeks feel longer. I don't know why. Maybe that extra day of vacation just makes you totally unprepared to return to the real world?

Jen @ The Short Years

I don't even stay in the bathroom with them anymore. My oldest is 6, and with all three of them crammed in the tub there's no way there's room for anyone to drown. It's mainly the not fighting and not getting water on the floor that gets me. (But doesn't get me enough to go in there and sit and watch while they play. Just enough for me to yell "Stop that!" from the other room when the splashing level gets too loud).

The Mama

That's one of the perks of renting for us too. There are so many things in our place that aren't perfect but it's not our problem so I don't worry about it.

HereWeGoAJen

Swim diapers are only meant to hold in poop, did you know that? I didn't, until I put one on her and then had to wash the car seat cover.

I figure bathwater is good for the immune system. I've never even bothered to try and stop that. In fact, sometimes I give her a cup.

People Whose Children Always Behave don't exist. It's a myth, perpetuated by mother in laws.

lindsay

we love our rental because it's ranch style so we don't live in a high rise and can get fresh air by just opening the front door. Our kitchen is super Ugg for sure but since it's a rental we just don't care. The only urge I have regarding housebuying is because I feel like I've been cultured to think that home ownership is what grown ups do. Like it's the responsible thing to do. Of course we'll get there one day but in the mean time this renting isn't bad at all from the whole 'not my problem' perspective.

E.

They should put warnings on those swim diaper packages, no? They are designed to let the pee pass RIGHT THROUGH them and just catch the solid waste. So you think they are all great until you realize you have been in the wading pool or whatever with your child and GOBS of their urine. Then you think you might as well just put them in the pool with no kind of baby undergarment until you realize the whole solid waste issue, and then? You go back to thinking they are all great.

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