This is where today's post would go if Typepad hadn't eaten it

SERIOUSLY! Stupid Typepad. It was a good post too. Very smart, very interesting, very clever. It was, truly, one of the best I've ever written. Ah well. These things happen when the universe gets nervous about this much brilliance unleashing itself all at once. 

Today's post originally contained many references to your comments yesterday, but it's too late and I'm too annoyed to go over all of THAT again. So I'll just reiterate the fact that I have The Best Readers Ever and apologize for bringing up politics and religion and other inappropriate topics at my own dinner party. I'll stick to refilling everyone's glasses and making introductions. For a while, anyway. 

So let's discuss something totally appropriate for a blog, a navel-gazing narcissistic self-aggrandizing blog, and that is: WHAT IS PHILLIP PLANNING FOR MY BIRTHDAY?

One of my very favorite things about my birthday is hounding Phillip about my present. And, now that I think about it, that's one of my favorite things about Christmas, Valentine's Day, my anniversary, Easter, Flag Day, YOU NAME IT. I loooove presents and I alllllways beg for information even though I would positively die if I found out ahead of time. I don't want to ruin the surprise! And yet the CONSTANT PESTERING is SO ENJOYABLE!

Except this year we are broke and I specifically requested No Present. Well, not so much broke, I guess, as putting all our extra money towards things like Las Vegas and Disneyland and Sacramento. (I did tell you guys this is the Summer O' Fun, right? Okay.) So while my blanket statement against all things present should not, in fact, lead my husband to believe he should actually NOT buy me a present (and don't fight me on this husbands, you will lose) I can't exactly go around pestering him about a present I told him not to purchase. Does this make sense? Of course it does. 

What I CAN do is pester him about what we are DOING. See, many many months ago, maybe around my twenty-NINTH birthday, I started making plans for my thirtieth. I was going to spend a CRAPLOAD of money on, oh, I don't know. A day at the spa? An overnighter? A shopping spree? Something deliciously fabulously rottenly FUN. Then we started filling in the Summer O' Fun and I was all, "Self, do you think you have a money tree?" and "Self, is the Summer O' Fun For Only You?" and decided to Scale Back. Instead I told Phillip I wanted to go out to dinner, somewhere that would require a Fancy Getup, the better to show off whatever I'd gained in my pursuit for Hot By Thirty. 

And he said, "Okay, I'll plan it."

And I was all, "Did you hear what you just said?"

And he said, "Yeah, I'll plan something."

And I said, "You just said that out loud. I heard you. Did you really want me to hear?"

And he stopped paying attention to me after that, but YOU GUYS. My husband was going to plan my birthday ALL BY HIMSELF!

So this is what I know:

We are going out to dinner somewhere that will require a Fancy Getup. Of course, he has a very hard time telling me whether I should wear THIS fancy getup or THAT one and what kind of SHOES and will I need a SWEATER etc. etc. and this is all very distressing. 

The two girls with whom I celebrate birthdays are going to dinner with us, along with their husbands. 

My mom knows more than I know. This is potentially bad for Phillip, because my mother CANNOT KEEP A SECRET. I mean, she had me open my birthday presents at my SISTER'S BIRTHDAY PARTY three weeks ago. However! She has told me NOTHING. 

One of my sisters knows something. I should probably just ask HER what I should wear, huh? Am idiot.

AND THAT'S IT. 

So every night for the last couple of weeks, the last thing I do before I fall asleep is say, "Phiiiiiilliiiip, where are we going for my biiiiirthdaaaaay?" And then he says something like, "It's bigger than a breadbox," because he is an OLD HAND at the pestering. HE CANNOT BE BROKEN. 

And I don't want to break him. I love being surprised. Well, technically, I've never been surprised before, but I KNOW I'LL LOVE IT! 

Anyway. It's a bummer today's post was sucked into the internet black hole because you got stuck with THIS, which is only up here because it's written somewhere in my genetic code that I must update my blog every single day. Or else I shrivel up and die. Or something. I don't know. I'm exhausted. I'm going to bed. After I nag Phillip, of course. I know he's been waiting anxiously! 

Comments

[Jess]

This is so cute. It makes me kind of wish that Torsten and I still did surprise gifts, but we hardly ever do that anymore. It's more like, OK, for my birthday I want to take a weekend trip (which we did for my birthday the last two years), and for his birthday he wants a gadget that he has to tell me about because I would have no way of knowing, and for Christmas we usually get something we both want. Actually, that's not entirely true. In 2007 he gave me a necklace and I gave him an internet radio, both things that we had expressed interest in but did not know we'd be receiving. But the last time there was something pester-worthy was in 2006, which was our first Christmas together, and I pestered him so much that he told me LIES in response to my questions in order to throw me off track. (It turned out to be a camera.)

This year for Christmas I think we're going to buy ourselves a recliner. Or maybe a shelf. OUR LIVES ARE SO HIP.

[Crystal]

That's so cute!

My present for my 30th this year was a nice dinner out as well. Only I didn't need the fancy getup, I just wanted to be able to EAT MY FOOD without little fingers grabbing this or throwing that. It was nice.

[Christiana]

I am terrible about pestering my husband about surprises. And he is just as terrible about teasing me with a regular declaration of "ha ha. ho ho. I know something you don't know." But he's pretty good w/ the planning and the gift giving, so I do pretty well in that dept. :)

I think my husband is planning something pretty wonderful for my 29th, since we're hoping to be pregnant/newly babied on my 30th next year.

[Angela Noelle]

Ooooh, I want to know where you are going!! Have a splendid time!