This morning, while Phillip was at the grocery store with Jack, I went upstairs to take a shower. I put Molly in the crib, popped a pacifier in her mouth and turned on the water. I did not grab Jack's baby monitor and reinstall it in my room so I could hear Molly, or roll the crib into the bathroom, although I did leave the door open. And when I had tons of shampoo in my hair and I heard her start crying, I simply washed out the shampoo, stepped out of the shower, put the pacifier back in her mouth and got back into my hot steamy beautiful shower.
I am way- like 100,000,000 times WAY- more relaxed about this baby.
Not about everything. I suffered wave after wave of anxiety yesterday after we got home from the hospital. The first time it had to do with the hearing test, which one ear failed to pass by, like, 3 points or something, and Phillip bringing up that study about how hearing loss in one ear is a correlating factor with SIDS. Then it was while I was feeding Molly and Phillip was giving Jack his lunch and I started to freak out about how I was going to feed two babies when Phillip goes back to work. Then it was at night when I realized I wasn't going to sleep and probably wasn't going to sleep ever again.
But other things! Other things I am the picture of Calm Cool and Collected. Putting the baby down, the squawking, dressing her, bathing her, not freaking out about the newborn skin weirdnesses, the schedule- OH MY GOD THE SCHEDULE. I didn't really have a schedule with Jack. I wasn't purposefully doing the feeding on demand thing, it's just what worked for my sleep deprived brain and it never really occurred to me to get him on a schedule until he was 3 or 4 months old. But yesterday I was all "Every two hours!" except if it wasn't exactly two hours I didn't really care, I wasn't writing it down and if she didn't eat when she was supposed to, no big deal we tried again a little bit later. Later this afternoon we have to take her to the pediatrician and I have not spent one minute of time wondering how and when I will feed her before (or after!) the 3pm appointment. This is where you start wondering if I have been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with some mutant anything-goes version of myself.
I have written one line of the How Molly Arrived On Earth story, but then I start to feel guilty about Liz pushing for forty-seven hours and Manda having back labor (and a TEN POUNDER). I have nothing to complain about, but since I fully intend to complain, I might have to wait a bit to get over this guilt complex thing.
Anyway. On to pictures!
(Maggie's Mom: Let's put on an outfit!
Maggie's Dad: She's not a PAPER DOLL.
Maggie and Maggie's Mom: You be quiet. WHERE ARE THE OUTFITS?)
Oops! I forgot my Contractually Obligated Link: Go read the birth announcement at Parenting and see yet ANOTHER picture.