Two months old
Jackson doesn't know what you're talking about. He and Pat are buddies.
I had a little bit of a freakout this weekend. I'm feeling like the novelty has worn off. I don't have a newborn anymore. I've been doing the full time mom thing. I know how to get the car seat out of the car and snapped into the stroller. I change diapers and clip fingernails. I allow the boy to chomp on me every three hours or so and it's worked so well I can no longer safely hold him in one arm. It's a difficult job, but I love doing it and I haven't missed my old job AT ALL.
But! I'm supposed to start earning actual money again. I'm supposed to start cooking again. I'm supposed to vacuum and clean the bathrooms and do all the things I was doing before I had the baby. Only this time I have to do them with the baby. And I am NOT READY.
Hence the freakout!
Photographic evidence that the eating thing is going well.
After sharing every last detail of the freakout with my patient husband (one of the perks of being married to me!) I narrowed everything down (mostly) to starting work again. Half because my new responsibilities are only vaguely defined and I will have to be Miss Assertive Pants to get it worked out and half because, well, I don't wanna. Work, that is. Can't I just wear my baby all day? I am totally cool with just sitting on the couch polishing off the candy dish and watching My Super Sweet 16.
What do you do with a baby who is so tired he CAN'T fall asleep? Like the one I have right now?
Anyway. I went to the office yesterday to 1) show off my cute kid and 2) attempt the assertive thing. But decisions are on hold until the boss men get back from their summer vacation and while this earns me an extra two weeks of TV and ice cream bars, it's also another two weeks of worrying about it. Gah. In the meantime Phillip is going to build me a splendid mobile workstation and I am going to brush up on my very dormant and nearly nonexistent skills. One day I hope to be able to work upstairs while one of the grandmas watches the baby downstairs, or work from my parents' house while a great-grandma keeps her eye on the baby rolling around on the floor. SOMETHING will work out. Wait, that's it. Now is the time where all the things I said "will just work out!" actually have to start working out.
For the love of GOD why isn't the baby sleeping? I'm HOLDING him, for goodness sake! Albeit in the Moby, but the Moby has been pure magic lately. He won't sleep in his crib, he won't sleep on my bed, he's only barely sleeping in the wrap. When is my sister going to show up so I can take a freaking shower already!
In other news, the cousins are coming to visit. My mother's head just might explode from glee. The Lieutenant better not let those boys eat my baby, that's all I'm saying. You think I jest, but he's talking about buying a kennel for the older one.
Off to slip my child some Valium.
2004-2010 Maggie Cheung. This drivel is licensed under 
Just so you know, Asher is nine months old today and I have yet to ever, like seriously, EVER, have dinner on the table for Dave before the kid goes to bed at 7:30. It just doesn't work for us like that. So don't worry about having to do EVERYTHING you're supposed to do.
As far as working goes, is it possible for you to do some after-hours work? Like, after Phillip gets home? That's what is working for us right now. I work as much as I can while Asher naps, but sometimes I take an evening and catch up while Dave watches the boy and puts him to bed. I mean, it's not the most relaxing of evenings, but at the same time, it's not EVERY night of the week.
Jackson is absolutely adorable. And Asher has that little outfit with the hood (!!!) albeit in a much much larger size.
Posted by: Emily | July 10, 2007 at 11:03 AM
Oh my gosh. The picture with Fat the Bunny--that's wonderful! :)
Posted by: Kate P | July 10, 2007 at 11:58 AM
You are cracking me up....don't be jealous but Annslee is napping peacefully in her crib..at 2.5 yrs old I still can get a 2-3 hour nap out of her YAY
Ok..enough salt in the wound...hope the work things comes together for you : )
Posted by: Laura | July 10, 2007 at 12:13 PM
I SO love reading you. Your wit and humor amuse me, and I'm that's amazing seeing as you probably aren't feeling, well, so AMUSED right now.
Posted by: kris | July 10, 2007 at 03:50 PM
don't ask about my typos, it's all hypoglycemic gibberish.... time to find myself an ice cream bar...
Posted by: kris | July 10, 2007 at 03:51 PM
Love the picture with fat the bunny! You are doing a GREAT job at what is really important now. And yeah, I'd be stressing about the other stuff too, but you really don't need to. Just deal with whatever's in front of you and accept that some stuff (like, um, dinner) might not get done. (I think I made pasta every night for weeks when my kids were babies. Easy, filling, what more can you ask?)
Posted by: Christina | July 10, 2007 at 04:33 PM
LOVE the bunny picture! Jackson is getting so big. And adorable too, of course. :)
Posted by: Tara | July 10, 2007 at 06:18 PM
First things first: your baby?? He is so very cute. I haven't been doing a very good job of reading blogs, but he has grown a ton since I last saw a picture. In the words of Chandler Bing: "Can he BE any cuter"?
I'm so with you on the working/not wanting to work issue. Can't we just go back to a simpler time when people could survive on one reasonable income? I've gone from staying home a year (and subsequently coming very close to financial ruin) with each baby, to working full time with a baby (and soooo not liking it), to working part-time with 2 babies (ok, one 'baby' is now 6, but whatever) and loving it. I know 'something' will work out---it's just hard waiting for the solution to find you sometimes.
Love reading your words.
Posted by: melissa | July 10, 2007 at 07:45 PM