Well done, Universe
Apparently all you have to do to get the universe to cave to your demands is whine about it on your personal website. Mighty Maggie management will be flying off to Colorado at an unholy morning hour Saturday morning and staying till Monday night. It won't be a terribly long trip, but management has never ever spent the night away from her husband and adorable baby nephew or not, two nights seems like an AWFUL LONG TIME.
Except we have spent one night away from each other, oops. Last summer Phillip attended a bachelor party slash camping trip in the wild woods outside of Seattle. There was to be fishing and grilling and much manliness involved. There was only one thing to do, of course. I rented Can't Buy Me Love and Say Anything, bought a flat of strawberries and some melting chocolate, and invited some of the bachelor party attendees' wives and girlfriends over for a Big Girly Sleepover. We'd just bought an actual mattress for the bed and we hadn't yet sold the futon mattress to the guy who drove the Mini (and that was cool, watching this guy slide our queen-sized futon mattress into his Mini) so we were all piled on the futon in the middle of the living room drooling over Patrick Dempsey and John Cusack. [And Network Television? It is a sad sad thing when even the glorious presence of Patrick Dempsey can't get me to watch that pile of dreck, Grey's Anatomy.]
So anyway, we're all in our PJs watching movies and licking chocolate from the bowl (okay, that was just me) when the phone rings.
MAGGIE: Hello?
PHILLIP: Hi.
MAGGIE: What's up?
PHILLIP: Um, yeah. We're not camping anymore.
MAGGIE: What? Why?
PHILLIP: Yeah. It's kind of raining.
MAGGIE: sneaking a look out the window It's barely raining. You wussy boys. You're going home?
PHILLIP: Um, we're already home.
MAGGIE: What!
PHILLIP: Right. We were trying to fish and all, but the rain was pretty bad and we didn't feel like setting up the tents in the mud, so, yeah, we're, uh, home.
MAGGIE: Well, you can't come home.
PHILLIP: Huh?
MAGGIE: We're having a PARTY. We are watching JOHN CUSACK. We are in our PAJAMAS.
PHILLIP: But I'm all wet. Can I come change?
MAGGIE: No, you can't come change. Didn't you hear the part about the pajamas? This is a GIRLS ONLY party.
PHILLIP: But where am I going to stay?
MAGGIE: You should always have a Rain Plan. Figure it out.
PHILLIP: But-
MAGGIE: AIIEEE! He's holding up the stereo! Gotta go!
Phillip ended up camping two blocks away at Neighbor's house because Neighbor was staying with me and her husband was one of the rained-out wussy boys and hello, Diane gave Lloyd a PEN. Some things are just REALLY IMPORTANT. (Also? Ione Skye? Is in Fever Pitch and she looks fabulous.)
So anyway. The point: it won't be the first time I've stayed away from Phillip. But it will be the first important time. It's a whole different STATE. I know this probably sounds silly to you people whose spouses travel for work and everything, but I'm going to whimper about it anyway. Wah. (Like how I find something to complain about even after the universe has given me everything I ever wanted? Right. I'm good at that.)
I had to write Sister a smarmy email to get out of confirmation practice on Sunday morning. (Turns out she won't be there either. Score!) And I had to talk up the adorableness of the nephew to my boss so he'd be cool with me taking time off for visiting and for moving. (Although, let's remember that this is the boss who said, "Of course we can push back your start date 3 weeks so you can go to China!" and "Of course you can go to Europe in September! Everyone should go to Europe!" and "You just take as much time for moving as you need!" because, in case I haven't mentioned it before, he ranks among the awesomest.)
Any ideas for good baby gifts? I've already sent this kid an extra super soft blanket (which I'm told he immediately pooped and peed on), a little rattle, wooden letter blocks that spell out FREAKING ADORABLE BABY PINCUS, and onesies that don't fit. I have some more onesies to bring along, but if you've given or received the Coolest Baby Gift Ever, be sure to let me know. I've gotta compete with five other girls for the Cool Aunt designation and I need the Internet's help! Any ideas for new parents would be good too.
So I'm just going to sit back and let you all work your gift suggestion magic. Oh, and box up the bridesmaid dresses that were mistakenly sent to me. (See, the store sent the Seattle dresses to Connecticut and the Connecticut dresses to me. I found this to be an extremely amusing development, but the Bride? Not so much.)

wooo, party at phil's!
Posted by: lee | April 29, 2005 at 09:43 AM